Weekly Parenting Challenge

They Have Rights Too!

2010-09-07T22:03:00.000-05:00

Have you ever thought about the rights of your children? Have you ever considered the fact that violation of those rights can result in rebellion? We usually don’t think of our children having rights. We pay the bills. We clothe them. We feed them. They are under our authority. They should do what we say. But I tell you parents, if we actually honored the rights of our children, we would find greater peace and harmony in the home and witness our children reaching their potential as sons and daughters in the community and as students in school.

What are some the rights of our children? In 2001, Michael Jackson shared these particular rights in a speech at Oxford University during his kickoff of a non-profit organization called Heal the Kids. It does not matter the source of this list, the fact remains that our children have rights too.

1. The right to be loved without having to earn it

2. The right to be protected, without having to deserve it

3. The right to feel valuable, even if you came into the world with nothing

4. The right to be listened to without having to be interesting

5. The right to be thought of as adorable - (even if you have a face that only a mother could love)

Our children probably don’t know they have these rights. Though they may be ignorant of these rights does not negate the fact that we have a sacred obligation to see to it that their rights are not violated. If you are a parent and have violated these children’s rights in any fashion, I challenge you to repent, do the right thing and see transformation in your home and in the lives of your children.

Have You Done Enough?

2010-07-20T21:19:00.003-05:00

Have you ever asked yourself, "Have I done all I can do for my children?" Are you on the verge of quitting and hoping for the best? When we want something really bad, we put forth all the effort we can to the point of exhaustion. I remember during college days, when studying for finals, I never came to the point where I said I've studied enough. There was always more to learn. I studied until I couldn't study anymore, sometimes up to the time of the exam. Then I ceased studying and applied my learning to the exam.

That is the expectation of God for Christian parents. He wants us to train our children and nurture them. As long as our children are under our roofs, there is always additional wisdom and knowledge we can teach them before they step out on their own. When they leave home, our training, teaching, and nurturing will cease, and the children will apply what they've learned. Therefore, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." (Galatians 6:9, NIV)

We cannot give up on our children. As long as they are under our roofs, we have not done enough. Let us continue sowing good seed. We might not see the fruit of our labor while our children are with us. But rest assured that we will reap what we sow, more than we sow, later than we sow.

How Did He Know?

2010-07-06T21:13:00.002-05:00

Introduction

If someone gave you one wish with a guarantee to fulfill it, what would you ask for? Would you ask for power, popularity, and prestige? Would you ask for riches beyond imagination? Would you ask from long life? How would you know what to ask for?

Explanation

Read 1 King 3:5,9 – “…God said, ‘Ask for whatever you want Me to give you. …So give Your servant a discerning heart to govern Your people and to distinguish between right and wrong.’ (NIV) Solomon had an opportunity to ask God for anything in the world, but all Solomon wanted was wisdom so he could please God who called him to be king.

Solomon, the author of many proverbs, wrote “When I was a boy in my father’s house, still tender, and an only child of my mother, he taught me and said, ‘Lay hold of my words with all your heart; keep my commands and you will live. Get wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or swerve from them. Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom.’” (Proverbs 4:3-7, NIV)

How did Solomon know to ask God for wisdom? He was taught such from his father while he was young. Solomon wrote the words of his father upon his heart. As a result, he received wisdom from God and much, much more. He received riches, honor, and long life.

Application

What is wisdom? Wisdom is the ability to know what is best and the willingness to do it.

Unfortunately, we impart little knowledge to our children. Therefore, when faced with tough decisions, they make the wrong ones. It only takes a few minutes to discuss the destructiveness of drugs, alcohol, and pre-marital sex and the significance of purity and a good education.

Sometimes we don’t feel fit to impart knowledge because of our past. That is not good enough. We should do our part and pray unto God that our children will put it into practice.

Conclusion

Solomon took the knowledge he received from his father and put it into practice. As a result, there existed no king like Solomon. Parents, let us give our children the knowledge they need to survive this corrupt society. Then trust in God that they will act upon it when faced with tough decisions.

Destroyed for the Lack of Knowledge

2010-06-23T08:04:00.001-05:00

You have probably heard the phrase, “What you don’t know can kill you.” I would like to add, “What you don’t know can destroy your child.” Our children are being introduced to all forms of temptations. If we as parents are not informed of such, we can’t equip our children for combat. Once we find out our children have fallen, it’s difficult to restore them back to normality.

Drugs and gangs are ruling our streets. There are many organizations whose sole purpose is to inform parents of signs to look for that might indicate our children are involved in drugs or gangs. Unfortunately, when informative meetings are arranged to equip us, we find all the reasons in the world why we can’t attend. After months of noticing an attitude change in our children, we become a little concern but not concern enough to attend these informative meetings. A year or so pass and we find our child in detention due to drug possession or affiliated with gang activities in the community or even worse, dead.

Many of us say that we love our children and would do anything to give them the best chance possible to reach their god-given potential. Do you love them enough to spend an hour being informed of the signs of gang or drug involvement? Our children are being destroyed because of our lack of knowledge. What you don’t know can destroy your child.

The parenting challenge is for us to start attending informative meetings arranged to equip us with the necessary tools to combat gang involvement and drug abuse. Learn as much as you can. Talk to your children about the dangers of drugs and gangs. Get them involved in positive activities that will engage their bodies and minds that they won’t have time for drugs and gangs.

What’s Important to You?

2010-05-24T19:06:00.003-05:00

We are all guilty of filling our lives with a whole lot of activities to keep us busy and to keep our children busy. It is now an abnormal event for families to sit at the table together and enjoy a meal and fun conversation. Who has time to cook? How can we get everyone at home at the same time? It’s just too much work. But if you think about it, if dinner with the family became important to you, you would make it happen. If you wanted to make Bible reading a normal part of your family lifestyle, you would. If you wanted to cut out some of the activities in your lives and in your children’s lives so you could see one another more often during the week, you would. What’s important to you?

Why don’t we just do it? Society has planted a seed in our hearts that if we are not busy and involved in all the “in” things going on, we are not living. In other words, we have fallen in love with the world and the things of the world. The lie that society has convinced us of as truth has become our truth and reality. The devil loves every bit of it. He knows that if he can keep the family disjointed and dysfunctional, God’s purpose will not be fulfilled by the family. Instead of values being taught around the table during dinner and Bible reading, we leave it for MTV, BET, CNN, TNT, NBC, CBS, FOX and the secular music industry to equip our children for life after leaving home. Unfortunately, when the kids leave home with values instilled in their hearts from all the wrong sources, they turn their back on God.

The parenting challenge is for us to do a self examination. Are our priorities in synch with God’s plan? If not, are we willing to reevaluate what’s really important and begin the process of transforming the home to be all that God has called it to be?

Plans to Give You a Hope and a Future

2010-05-11T20:30:00.002-05:00

It is natural for us as parents to desire great things for our children as they grow into adulthood. We lead and guide our children the way we think is best for them based on their physiques, their talents, their looks, and their personalities. But it is the Almighty God who molded and shaped our children in the mothers' wombs, who predetermined before the beginning of time His plan and purpose for their lives. It is God who has already planned in advanced what He desires of them for His holy purpose. But we as parents have leaned on our own understanding and not trusted in the Lord to bring to pass His desires.

Please follow this carefully. Every child who has accepted Jesus Christ as Lord has the Spirit of God dwelling inside of them. And the Spirit of God knows the mind of God. Now God said in Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." (NKJV) If God has thoughts and plans for our children and the Holy Spirit of God knows the mind of God, who is it that can best reveal God's future plan for our children? Parents or the Holy Spirit?

1 Corinthians 2:9, 10 says, "But as it is written: 'Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him.' But God has revealed them to us through His Spirit. For the Spirit searches all things, yes, the deep things of God." I believe with all my heart that if our children ask the Lord His plan and purpose for their lives, God will answer. Not only will He answer, but He will begin transforming the hearts of our children that they will have a strong passion and desire for the purpose of God. And every move they make and every action they take will lead them closer to their destiny in Christ Jesus.

Parents, sit down and seriously discuss with your children who have accepted Jesus as Savior God's plan and purpose for their lives. Encourage them to pray unto the Lord and sincerely ask God to reveal to them His plan and purpose for their lives. Teach them to listen. Discuss with them your testimony when you decided to pursue God's plan and purpose in your life instead of your own. And pray for the children as well that the Lord will make all things clear to the children that they won't waste time but understand what the will of the Lord is. Parents, this goes for us as well. If you are uncertain about your purpose, you can tap into the true source of the mind of God and start today living a more fulfilling life than ever before.

Warm Weather and Disobedience

2010-04-27T22:21:00.001-05:00

When did it become a norm that our children become disobedient, unlawful, and riotous when the weather gets warm? Has it always been that way? Our community has bought into this lie and it has become an escape goat for children and adults to create havoc in our schools and communities. Have you bought into this lie parents? Are you allowing your children to become a part of the problems in the schools and the streets instead of disciplining them, admonishing them, and encouraging them to do what is right?

We should expect the world to do this because “the god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.” (2 Corinthians 4:4) But this is the time when Christian parents must resolve to stand fast to what is right and be immovable that our children will see us being faithful to God all the time and not in certain seasons.

Parents, warm weather does not bring disobedience. A rebellious spirit does. God has provided us with the simple solution to such a spirit. “Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with the rod, he will not die. Punish him with the rod and save his soul from death.” (Proverbs 23:12,13) Let’s do our part to make our schools and streets better, not worse.

Spring Cleaning

2010-04-19T20:48:00.003-05:00

Has “stuff” around the house accumulated to the point where there is no room to freely move about? Everywhere you turn, you trip over “stuff” that causes an outburst of anger and frustration. You promise to do something about it but not right now. Therefore, throughout the spring, you live with the thorn of “stuff” until spring becomes summer becomes fall become winter becomes spring again. What happens is that the “stuff” looks so overwhelming and intimidating that you procrastinate until the opportunity is lost. If you would do things little by little, you would at least progress towards a successful spring cleaning.

And so it is with us as parents. We are so overwhelmed with issues and drama that are going on in our homes that we put off addressing them until a more opportune time. Day by day, the “stuff” of life becomes a thorn in our flesh and causes outbursts of anger and frustration with ourselves and towards our children. Instead of trying to handle all the trials and struggles at once, try addressing them one at a time, little by little. As a result, we will experience transformation of our home as we progress towards a successful spring cleaning.

Why do we spring clean our physical homes? We don’t want our homes to become a repulsive place where people avoid visiting. In the same way, we don’t want to become repulsive to be around because of our negative spirits caused by lack of spring cleaning.

Parents, start spring cleaning the issues and drama in your household today. Make a list of all the things you think are needed to make for a better home. Commit your list unto the Lord. He will guide you on which item to address first. Take on one item at a time and experience transformation of your home and family.

Properly Equipped

2010-04-13T19:55:00.003-05:00

In most areas of our lives, in order to be successful, we must be properly equipped. We can be the best painters in the world, but if we don’t have paint and a paintbrush, we are nothing. We can be the best hair stylist in the southeast, but if we don’t have the right instruments, being a stylist profit us nothing. Without the proper equipment, we won’t get far.

And so it is with us as parents. We may think we got it going on as parents, but if we don’t have unconditional love, patience, faith in God, we are failing. The combination of loving our children in spite of what they do, being patient even when inconvenienced, and trusting that God will take care of the children when they are outside your presence builds strong relationships and makes for successful parents.

Parents, to be properly equipped require us to step outside the natural into the supernatural. It is only through the Holy Spirit of God that we will be able to love as Christ loved us, to endure difficult and trying times, and to trust in the Lord with all our heart. If you have tried to become a properly equipped parent without the Spirit of God, you probably have failed over and over again. But if you are a child of God, you are able. Surrender to the Spirit of God, equip yourself and watch how stronger your bond with your children will become.

Be Passionate

2010-04-05T21:52:00.001-05:00

There were beautiful events Easter Sunday as many thousands witnessed their children deliver the message of the Gospel of Jesus Christ in creative ways. Parents worked diligently to ensure their children were prepared to present their message clearly, concisely, and without error. Parents experienced anxiety, excitement, and pride as each child successfully delivered the powerful, yet simple message of the love of Jesus. Their work was not in vain.

It is that very same passion that God desires parents to have in equipping the children to be young disciples for Jesus. God wants His Word to be written upon the hearts of the children that they will not sin against Him. Some parents don’t feel they have the knowledge or wisdom necessary to teach their children about God.

Parent, though your passion for teaching your children about God is not as intense as it was when teaching them their Easter speeches, be passionate about getting them to places where they can be taught. Be passionate about getting the children to Sunday School or to Bible Study or to Children’s Church. The local church is available to supplement your teaching so that together, you and the Church can make true disciples for Jesus. The challenge for this week is to stop making excuses for why you can’t get your child to a discipleship class and be as passionate as you were to get them to Easter practice. You have proven it can be done.

For All The Family

2010-03-29T19:15:00.003-05:00

Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. - Deuteronomy 6:4-9

If we want to see change in our families, we have to make a change. The first and one of the most important changes we can make is to make sure that our children are grounded in the word of God. Hosea 4:6 says, "...my people are destroyed from lack of knowledge." God desires both us and our children to love Him. We love Him by keeping His commandments. To keep God's commandments, we must know His commandments.

Let us sit down with our families each night and take 1 minute, minimal, to read a portion of God's Word. There are 1440 minutes in a day. Can we spare one minute to allow God to speak to our hearts through His Word? In 1 minute, you can read at least 3 verses. Do not allow church services, Sunday School, or Wednesday Bible Study to be a substitute. Do not allow any negative attitudes or weariness cause you to skip a day. Your children will begin to appreciate the Word, get to know God more personally and reverence His commandments. Eventually, you will want to spend more time listening to God.

This week's Parenting Challenge is to make daily Bible reading a family tradition to be passed on from one generation to the next.